Saturday, February 21, 2009

Stomach Inflammation is a Biatch

So I naively thought that my stomach was going to start feeling better now that I'm on Prevacid and Zantac to help reduce the acid (and hopefully inflammation). Boy, was I wrong! Yesterday morning I was gripped by the worst nausea yet. In fact, it was so bad that both ends of my system were overloaded. I practically crawled from the bathroom to the couch after emptying everything and downing my anti-nausea meds. And the meds promptly knocked me out for a while. Just what I needed: taking MORE leave time from work. Ugh.

In other news, I find that I am becoming less optimistic about TTC. I don't know why. Really, I should be happy and thankful that I'm getting all these diagnostics. But instead, I seem to be subconsciously thinking that it's inevitable that we won't be able to have kids. I know that positive thought and even visualization is necessary in order to achieve our goal, so I am slightly horrified by these thoughts that I can't seem to control. I wish I could just bang my head against a wall and have these thoughts magically fall out. Really, what is wrong with me? Even at 9 months of trying, we're really just beginning our TTC journey (at least, this is my impression). I hope that I can hold out for the long haul.

I called Quest the other day to figure out the nearest lab that can do P's SA. Unfortunately, the nearest one is 45 minutes away! And since you're really supposed to get the sample to the lab about 30 minutes after it's given, I fear that P might actually have to give his sample AT the lab. He is not at all enthused about this idea. I'm sure I could go with him...errrr, I guess I'd better call the lab and ask. Another option might be for him to call our insurance company and see if he can drop the sample off at the hospital (which is only 10 minutes away, tops). But getting him to call will be a challenge on its own. ::sigh::

Anyway, here's to some hopefully more positive thinking in the near future! I think I may actually start posting on The Nest/Bump again soon, because not having anyone to talk to about this stuff is starting to get to me.

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