Thursday, February 4, 2010

Is Anybody Out There?

Wow. I almost completely forgot about this blog. Seriously.

The reason I've neglected it so? I have ZERO to report on the baby front. Absolutely zero.

We did confirm that P's testosterone levels are low. He started testosterone supplements. He's on thyroid replacement therapy for his underactive thyroid. We saw an endocrinologist who then took him OFF the testosterone because he said it was contradictory to our quest to get pregnant.

And then... P. had a stroke. My 33 year old husband had a STROKE.

This is not something I would have expected, of course. And it happened while I was out of town on business. (I'll live with that strange guilt the rest of my life.)

This happened in October. He's been through a bazillion tests since. Turns out he has a hole in his heart. He's actually having surgery to close it in 2 weeks, which is good.

But all thoughts of having a child have obviously fallen by the wayside in light of all this. And honestly, I've pretty much given up on the prospect. I know that sounds depressing and all...and I suppose it really is. I've been filling my time with other pursuits, which makes all of that easier to forget. But I realize I'm probably causing myself some future mental anguish, and I probably should get my rear to some sort of therapy. I suppose.

Or maybe I'm really OK with everything? Who knows? All that really matters at this point is getting P. healthy. Hopefully we can accomplish that this year.

Before I popped in here to type, I quickly checked some of the IF blogs I used to read diligently. (Gawd, I haven't logged into The Nest/TTTC board in a million years.) I'm so sad to see there isn't a whole lot of good news out there. I really hope that everyone out there gets what they want. Truly. We all deserve it. Good luck to you all!

Can't promise I'll post again anytime real soon, but at least my memory has returned as far as recognizing that I have this blog out here. :-)